“So after Abram had lived in Canaan for ten years, Sarai, Abram’s wife, gave Hagar, her Egyptian servant, to her husband to be his wife. He slept with Hagar, and she became pregnant. Once Hagar realized she was pregnant, she despised Sarai. Then Sarai said to Abram, “You have brought this wrong on me! I gave my servant into your embrace, but when she realized that she was pregnant, she despised me. May the Lord judge between you and me!” Genesis 16: 3-5
Ten years can seem like forever when you are waiting for something you desperately want, waiting to be healed, waiting for a husband, or like Sarai, waiting for a child. I imagine that desperation, grief, and frustration motivated her to take matters into her own hands and give Hagar to her husband. But when Hagar becomes pregnant, the situation goes from bad to worse. No one is happy, not Abram, not Hagar, and certainly not Sarai. She lashes out, as we all often do, at the person closest to her, blaming her husband for a decision she made.
Like Sarai, it often seems like our deepest desire remains unfulfilled. We read in Psalm 37 that if we “delight” ourselves in the Lord, He will “give us the desires of our heart.” And like Sarai, we wonder when that will happen. We fret, we scheme, we worry, we fuss and fight, and we often create conflict and strife to fulfill that need. We want what we want now. Instead, God often wants us to be patient and wait. Why? If I knew the answer to that, I would be God. But if He truly is Lord of my life, wouldn’t He know best? Aren’t His ways better than mine? Isn’t His plan perfect? Do I trust and believe in Him or not? If, like me, you are waiting for God’s provision, be patient. Don’t fret, it leads only to evil. Don’t create conflict. Instead, trust in God’s timing and in His plan.